Are You Good at Making Friends

Are you good at making friends or do you take time to make friends? Do you feel making friends is easy or do you find it challenging to make friends or keep up with existing ones? Have you ever evaluated yourself on this aspect?

Those who believe they are good at making friends can read this post to enhance their friend making skills. Whereas, I’m sure the ones who aren’t already good enough will also find the post really helpful.

We usually know if we take time to make friends or to upkeep the existing friendships. If it really becomes a cumbersome task, we are even forced to question the relevancy and need of having friends.

“Be slow to fall into friendship, but when you are in, continue firm and constant.” ? Socrates

Why Do We Need to be Good at Making Friends

Each one of us needs friends, because a friend relieves the feeling of loneliness and helps you enjoy life. They even help to improve your health and reduce stress.

Having good friends in helpful especially when you are undergoing depression, experiencing panic attacks, phobias, delusions, or have had major surgery, and lost someone close.

Making friends does help us in many ways, moreover, if it is a requisite skill then we better be good at it, as simple as that.

Making friends is both an art and a skill, which most of us learn with time. Some are born with the skill and others develop it with time and experience.

“A friend knows the song in my heart and sings it to me when my memory fails.”  ~Donna Roberts

Is it Hard to Make Friends

I had recently read about why it’s so hard to make friends for those who are over 30, and thought to raise this topic in today’s post.

I do agree to quite an extent that as you age, you tend to make fewer friends, though for some people making friends as they age gets easier.

The beauty is that anybody can learn this art at any age. When trying to make friends, you neither have to follow complicated procedures, nor do you have to perform any rigorous tasks.

Making friends can be an uphill task or an exciting one, depending on your circumstances and your personality, but finally it is rewarding.

Remember, it is not hard to make friends if you really want to do so. But before you proceed to be good at making friends, you need to understand more about what really makes a friend.

“A friend is someone who knows all about you and still loves you.” ~ Elbert Hubbard

Who is a Friend

Let’s try to understand who a friend is and what can you do to make friends. Here are some indicators that may help you in making friends.

A friend:

• Checks in without bothering about the distance. The friendship doesn’t end when your car pulls away or the plane takes off!
• Takes interest in their friends lives. They are always there, supporting and learning from them.
• Is willing to share, care, understand, and love you unconditionally.
• Compliments you without going overboard, yet is fair enough to tell you your faults.
• Is kind, compassionate, fair, and knows you through and through.
• Always remains loyal and is ready to make sacrifices when the need arises.
• Always puts forward their shoulder to lean and cry on if required.
• Encourages, motivates, and inspires you to move ahead in life.
• Is trustworthy; someone who you can blindly rely on and share anything under the sun.
• Likes you as you are without really trying to change you, even if they don’t understand you fully.
• Gives you the space to change, grow, make decisions, and even make mistakes.
• Allows you to express your emotions and feelings, without criticizing, judging, or teasing you.
• Doesn’t take advantage of you, instead gives you good advice when you seek it.
• Will not flatter you; instead tell you honestly what they think of you.

Furthermore, we don’t really have to keep in mind where our friends come from when we make friends, because they come from all walks of life, with all sorts of belief.

They might have different jobs, religion, background, or status. Sometimes they push us to the limit, while at other times they make mistakes – sometimes small and sometimes big. But they still remain our friends.

“What is a friend? A single soul dwelling in two bodies.” ~ Aristotle

I had to share this wonderful song that I’m sure all of you must have heard by Stevie Wonder and his friends – That’s What Friends Are For – enjoy!

 That’s what friends are for ~ Stevie Wonder ~ You Tube Video

The Art of Making Friends

Making friends, either new ones or keeping up with older ones is not difficult, nor is it that easy. It all depends on you and the friendship you build or maintain.

However, before you start making friends you need to like yourself and feel that you are valuable. If you don’t think others will like you, you might have a hard time reaching out to those who may become friends.

You need to work on building your self-esteem and finding your inner-strength by treating yourself well. Learn to love yourself with all the faults you have because this helps you to love your friends with all their faults as well.

Do this by eating healthy food, getting plenty of rest and exercise, and doing things you enjoy. Remind yourself that you are a very especial and worthwhile person.

Also, remain your original self without trying to portray a fake personality. Let your friends see the real you, and if they are unable to accept you for what you are, then it’s time to move on and make new friends.

“A friend is one that knows you as you are, understands where you have been, accepts what you have become, and still, gently allows you to grow.” ~ William Shakespeare

Ways to Make Friends

Making friends is an art or more of a skill that each one of you can accomplish. All that’s needed is that you develop trust in your friendship and follow the following ways to make friends:

1 - Talk to people

You can do this by joining clubs, going to the church, or at school and college. Remember, if you want to make new friends, you need to spend more time around people by putting yourself among them.

Friends don’t normally come to your doorstep, and it’s mostly you who will have to make the effort to reach out and connect first.

You can even volunteer to work together, where you get the chance to meet people of all ages. Even community activities like sporting events, concerts, art shows, movies, or special interest groups are nice places to make friends.

You don’t really need to have lots of common interests to make friends. In-fact some of the friendship between two people works well where both don’t have much in common.

All you need to remember is to talk and communicate with people, anywhere and everywhere possible, without really being picky.

Ask questions about their hobbies or their likes and share yours. Keep the conversation cheery and light initially. Most conversationalist suggest following a 30/70 pattern, where 30% talking and 70% listening occurs during small talk.

2 - Make online friends

Making friends online has picked up a great deal nowadays. Speaking of which, I have some wonderful online friends now than I ever did before. In-fact, I have more of online than offline friends!

Social networking sites like Twitter, Facebook, Google+, BlendAbout are great places to meet new people and learn more about them.

3 - Initiate a conversation

You don’t really have to wait for the other person to talk to you. Instead, you can start a conversation on your own.

Some ways to do this are by commenting about things around you or the immediate environment. Or compliment the other person, ask questions about the person, show them that you are interested in them also.

Some people like to introduce themselves at the end of the conversation, while others start a conversation by introducing themselves.

Either ways, once you introduce yourself, the other person also does the same and that can be the start of a wonderful conversation.

4 - Smile and be cordial

People are less likely to be receptive to you if you don’t smile or have an unfriendly appearance.

You need to be friendly, approachable, and not look bored. Don’t frown, or keep your arms folded that show you aren’t interested. Instead, just be your natural self and try to get to know the other person.

5 - Learn to listen

While talking is required, you also need to listen to what the other person is saying, especially if are trying to make friends.

You need to show that you are interested in the talks and remember important details about them, like their likes, dislikes, or interests.

6 - Plan a get-together

Once you feel that you have talked a little and there are things that you can carry onto another discussion – then plan getting together.

You can talk your heart out as you get more familiar with each other for which you need to meet more often. Meet up at any place that is common to both of you, or choose an entirely new place, whichever is suitable.

You could even plan to go out for lunch or share a cup of coffee to get more acquainted with one another.

7 - Don’t pressurize

If someone isn’t interested in making friends with you, then let them be. Don’t call them repeatedly or stop by uninvited if they are not keen.

Making friends takes time and if you are not sure about where your friendship is headed, then it’s best to ask and clear things up.

Sometimes old friends suddenly change or there is a breakup due to any reason. At such times, give things time and if they still don’t get alright, accept the change and learn to move on.

8 - Enjoy yourself

While making friends, have a good time by spending time with your friends doing interesting and fun activities, together.

Try going for movies, play ball, go to the beach, work on an art project, watch a fun video, cook up a meal together. Anything that gives you both happiness; and take turns to initiate such activities.

9 – Keep in touch

Once you have made friends, it’s important to keep meeting up often to keep in touch. Making friends isn’t a one time affair or something that you work on once and then leave it. You need to keep working on building your friendship.

You can enrich your friendship by making home visits to your friend’s place and spending time with one another. Make your friend feel welcome and comfortable at your home as well.

If you are too busy to meet, call your friend and let them know when you can meet next, or express your desire but inability to meet. You must keep in touch either ways.

“Don’t walk behind me; I may not lead. Don’t walk in front of me; I may not follow. Just walk beside me and be my friend.” ~ Albert Camus

Speaking of myself, my husband is my best friend! He is one person who is always around and with whom I can share just about anything.

Similarly, if you are married, you too can make your spouse your best friend and make your life’s journey worthwhile. You don’t really need anyone else if you have each other in your lives.

Yes, it seems hard to go out and make new friends, but you need to push yourself through those hard feelings and go. Most of the time, you will be glad you made friends.

You might like to take this interesting poll to know how good you really are at making friends. Remember, making new friends is not easy, but it’s not difficult either.

Finally, when you are making friends, remember to be a true friend to your friend and stand by them. Though friendship usually takes a lot of time to cultivate, but if the seeds are sown well, they do reap good results.

“Like wine, a good friendship only improves with age.” ~ Turkish saying

Over to you -

Are you good at making friends? How do you feel about making friends – is it easy or difficult? Do you feel with age you make more or less friends? What tips would you give to get better at making friends? Share you experiences of making friends in the comments below.

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How to fight stage fright?

For some people the word ‘stage ‘sounds as dreadful as ‘death’. These are the people who go numb, cold and sweaty the moment they stand on a stage and face an audience; such people are said to be suffering from ‘stage fright’.

People suffering from performance anxiety would start trembling, sweating and shivering at the mere mention of the word ‘stage’. Stage fright is very common, especially among teenagers and youngsters and sometimes even among adults. Such people are generally over conscious about the people around them and what they will think about them. They feel extra self-conscious and tend to self-confidence when confronted with a huge audience. This is the reason why they don’t feel assured enough in front of a huge crowd/audience and tend to be petrified. Their heart starts throbbing, their mouth goes dry, their voice gets chocked in the throat and they seem to forget breathing for some time! Even very confident and eminent personalities often showcase these characteristics while facing a huge crowd.

So, if you share mutual signs mentioned above when you step on the stage, in front of the mike then you have indeed landed up on the right page! Some proficient weapons have been suggested below, which can help you fight a war against stage fright:

• One of the most vital things: Do your homework properly. Be prepared and thorough with whatever you are going to present on the stage. This will help you gain confidence. If you don’t know your topic properly then you are bound to lose confidence and fumble on the stage.
• Remember the old saying: Practice makes a man perfect.This is indeed the most important weapons of all. Practice vigorously before going on to the stage. Stand in front of the mirror and practice multiple times to gain confidence. Look at yourself in the mirror while practicing; Keep improving to make sure your body language, facial expressions and overall presentation is good enough when presented in front of the audience.
• Before going on to the stage, induce positive thoughts about yourself and the audience in your mind and convince yourself that you can do it. Take a deep breath, relax and calm down yourself before you go on stage to give your performance.
• Try reaching the venue few minutes before so that you can take time to acquaint yourself with the stage, surroundings, atmosphere and most important of all-the audience. Knowing your audience is a very crucial aspect to be kept in mind, especially when it comes to fighting stage fright.
• Don’t ever be afraid of the audience because you must understand that the audience is there to watch your performance and not to criticise or judge. So even if you make mistake, don’t panic, apologise (in case of a speech), correct it and continue with your remnant performance.
• The toughest task during a stage performance is: Facing the audience. This is one of the prime things, which triggers off stage fright in most of the people. To deal with this problem, make sure you don’t make an eye contact with the audience. Just normally and randomly keep panning your sight over everyone or if you are too scared to do that, look at the nearby walls in a way that the audience thinks that you are looking at them.
• Last but not the least; this is like the golden key to overcome stage fright- Instead of creating a taboo out of stage performance and dreading it, make it a point to enjoy and relish it.

So next time you step on a stage, keep these points in mind, follow them and I can guarantee that you will surely get the loudest applaud ever from the audience!

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How to Discover Hidden Talents within You and Begin Applying Them in Your Life Now

Everyone is blessed with a hidden talent in them. God cannot be so unfair to all his children. Even if, you can make your tongue touch your nose, which is also considered as a hidden talent. Thus, here are some ways by which you can discover the hidden talent within you.

By brainstorming, our hidden talents could be explored Choose a time and a proper place where you can relax and spend some time. Now take your memory to your childhood days, your Pre-school days, your high school and college days and your first job as fresher.

Now, recollect the memories about what were the activities you were expert at? What gave you excitement? You used to feel tremendously happy and excited while performing some activities with your friends and family members.

Take a pen and paper and write down a list of all the things you have always thought you might enjoy or be skilful at, you will be surprised at the number of them. This is not just about work or business, but speaks to the whole substance of your life.

You start keeping 5 minutes of quiet time to consider an idea. Give yourself space and time to do this, to avoid distraction, write a note. Let your mind stroll, who knows our best ideas may pop up into our heads when we’re not thinking about anything in particular. You may find wacky yet creative ideas which you can later give a shape to fulfill.

In your childhood when you used to play alone yourself, sometimes your favorite time-pass was acting like a teacher by teaching your dolls, or sometimes you became the doctor of your pets or managed an event like a birthday party of your doll. These were the reflections of your inner self’s imagination, and so the imaginations are not influenced by other people. In our childhood, our inner self is more articulate than our alert mind. These are your hidden talent you were unconsciously doing when you felt happy and comfortable with yourself.

In early 1970s people in a small town who had a talent for glass painting may never have been able to learn more about it. The local library did not have the books, non availability of local teacher or knowledge about buying materials or joining tutorial classes were also abandoned. So people never had the opportunity to excel his hidden talent that would make him happy. In the modern age with the use of the internet, there is no obstacle to find any details to fulfill one’s passion. Through the internet facility, we have the opportunity to get information within no time about any topic we want to learn. Free online Beginner’s Lessons are available on anything which is an incredible benefit providing us with endless opportunities.

From your choice of reading magazines or sections of news paper like Travel, movie reviews, sports, health, religion, politics, most of your hidden talents can be identified.

Our friends, family, associates often recognize and compliments about what we are expert at, but we do not pay attention to that praise. In order to find our own hidden talents, we should listen to what people find about me.

Our talents instead of being hidden or haphazard should be discovered and finding things we love doing make a lot of sense. We can study some beginner’s lessons, join a local tutorial class of that subject, also can join a group or team. We could write blogs, websites or do online businesses.

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How to Boost Your Creativity at Work

What is meant by creativity? Research says, “it is the ability to make, produce, cause to exist or bring into being; the ability to make something out of nothing or to make something better than it was before.” Therefore a common saying, “If you’re alive, you’re creative.”

It is important to point out that not everyone has a well developed right sided brain. It is only a blessed few who have this raw talent that needs to be nurtured to make it into a “creative success.”  So while working we realize we are doing less with more. So it is important to apply creativity at work such that we are able to extract more out of the less.

There are ample of ways to increase one’s creativity, but at the end of the day we all are human beings and there comes a stagnant stage where we run into the wall. The only recovery from this is to take a break and strategize. Here are some ways of sharpening the creative method by which one’s creativity can be sharpened.

• The first step is to find out certain unique features in your personality and applying it in your work field. Try to develop those unique features into skills which can also be done by taking help from others who understand you better.

•  You must become in you field of work. Thus, a rich understanding of the matter helps you become more innovative and novel as you implement your ideas to your work. This will add a boost to your work.

•  Be more inquisitive and curious and ask questions. This will help you understand topics better and facilitate your creativity.

•  It is also essential to take risks as you may not be the victor all the time, but at least it will boost your creative knowledge and talent and will benefit you in future.

•  Insecurity can suppress the creative person inside you. So it is important to be confident in whatever you do and whichever step you take. This helps you enhance your creativity better.

•  Think positive. According to a study in the year 2006, it has been found out that thinking affects progress. Positive thinking enhances creativity. According to Dr. Adam Anderson, “If you are doing something that requires you be creative or be in a think tank, you want to be in a place with good mood.”

•  The fear of failure might hinder your progress towards applying creativity in work. So failure should be taken up as a challenge and tackled carefully.

•  Brainstorming for new ideas is also essential, as ideas don’t come just like that. A lot of thinking is required.  The rationale behind this is to generate as many ideas as possible in a limited period of time.

Lastly, it essential to make a note of everything creative that comes to your mind.

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Creative ways to get product ideas

Consumers are always on the prowl for creative and innovative products in the market. People get tired of mundane products and are always on the lookout for something new and exciting. Therefore it is very important for a company to keep coming with creative product ideas in order to attain success.As they say , “ When you stick to conventional ideas , you get conventional results”.Here are some of the ways in which companies can make sure that they are doing exactly that.

1. Current trends and familiarization

Observing surrounding situations and learning more about current trends will always be beneficial for you as a company. Making the product relevant and related to “what’s in “is a very important factor to the immediate success of the product.

2. Reincarnation

It’s natural to run out of ideas when it comes to design and innovation. In this case you should think of taking up and existing product and reinventing it to atleast appear like its something new.You can either play around with its features and characteristics to give it a new dimension. Reincarnation may also involve removing certain aspects of the product to make it special and indispensible.

3. Combine

It is always a good idea to think of combining the physicality or properties of two products and sell that as an entirely different new product.

4. Surveys and research

Talk to consumers and find out what their need is. Then you can develop the product to satisfy their needs and thus gain from them too .Try to offer the consumer a package which he wont get from your competitor in the same field.

5. Brainstorming

It may happen that only half an idea subconsciously lies in your head. In this case , brain storming helps in combining your idea with someone else’s half and creating something absolutely unique. They also help in corrective discussions and ideas that may be a failure can be more easily spotted.

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Steve Jobs Biography

Most innovative and ground-breaking inventions like Macintosh, Mac Book, i pad, i phone and i pod brought about a revolution in the world of technology and the only ‘i con’ who deserves all the credit is ‘Steve Jobs’ –who is considered as the father of modern technology by people today.

Steven Paul Jobs the CEO, co-founder and chairman of Apple Inc., was born on 24 February, 1955 in San Francisco, California. Paul and Clara Jobs adopted him from an unwed college graduate couple.

He spent his early years in the hub of computer technology i.e. Silicon Valley. At the age of 14, he came across Stephen Wozniak- a computer boffin. Jobs studied one semester in Reed College in Oregon and then dropped out. When he returned back to Valley he started taking interest in his friend, Woz’s effort on computer board. He attended the Homebrew Computer Club with Woz. He quickly realized its commercial demand andstarted assembling boards in his garage and sold them to computer stores. Thus Apple Computer was born!

While Jobs was selling, Woz came up with Apple II which wobbled the market with its superfluous advance technology. Looking at the growing market demand and popularity, Mike Markkula confided to invest $250, 000 in Job’s business to help him expand his business. Soon, Apple II flooded the markets. Steve Job’s fortune crossed $200 million when he was only 25.

In 1981 IBM, was preparing to venture into the market of PCs and Apple III was already blown-up in the market. So to retain in the market, they put all their vigour on Job’s new project- ‘Lisa’ whichwas equipped for the first time with GUI. But due Job’s erratic behaviour he was kicked out of Lisa Project.

Enraged, he decided to launch a new project called Macintosh, in an attempt to make it the cheapest and most user-friendly GUI computer ever. It was a big danger to Apple’s future as Lisa proved to be a disappointment in the market. So, in 1983 Jobs lend a helped John Sculley, the CEO of Apple and together they launched Macintosh with a huge success. But due to his haughtiness, he was refrained from having any managerial duties. This annoyed him all the more and so in 1986 he co-founded Pixar with George Lucas, thus making a profit of $10 million for the company.

Then depression period followed in Job’s life. He founded a new company called NeXt, which turned out to be a fiasco. Luckily, Pixar’s 1st feature film Toy Story proved to be 3rd highest domestic earning animated film, which added a worth of $1.5 million to Job’s bank account.

Meanwhile Apple Inc. had lost its track and writhed with a loss of $700 million. They called Jobs back to the company and hired his NeXt Step technology to replace the old one for $400 million. Soon in July 1997 he became the CEO of Apple.

With his arrival in the company, they were now climbing the steps of success with the launching of popular devices like Power Mac G3, PowerBook, iMacs, iBook, consumer Notebook, Mac OS X, and iApps. Then a turning point came in his life with the invention of iPod and iTunes which hit the markets with a big bang.

Steve Jobs still shared 50% of Pixar’s stocks. In 2005, he and the new CEO of Disney, Bob Iger started working together and thus Pixar and Disney merged together.

By now Apple Inc. had established its Brand name among the most trusted brands. Second big revolution occurred with the introduction of iPhone. Finally the third major event which marked its success in the history of Apple was the announcement ofiPad, Apple’s iOS-based tablet on January 27, 2010 thus putting an end to the era of PCs.

After the launch of incredibly marvellous iPhone 4S, on 5 October, 2011 not only Macworld, but the whole world mourned at the loss of iCon – Steve Jobs. He was truly a man with extraordinary endowments. He gave a completely new direction to the modern world of technology with Apple Products and compelled the world to ‘Think Different’. Hats off!to this great man.

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How to get a great Facebook Profile Picture?

Do you wish to look awesome in your facebook profile picture? I think most of us want that! After all, it is just like a virtual high, a scrapbook of family and friends and a resume all rolled in one! So, no wonder we want to look the best! Here are few tips to get a perfect picture for your facebook profile picture without using any editing softwares like Photoshop or other.

1. First and foremost things you should do is dress your best! If you are looking a profile picture that fetches many ‘likes’; wear clothes that flatter you the most! V- Necks make you look taller and thinner.  While boat necks help balance our shoulders. Choose the look that makes you look great and feel confident.

2. Wear the right make-up, make-up is one thing that says a lot about you and your personality! A light touch up of powder will help prevent sunshine from flash! You must also make sure that you hide dark spots if you’ve any. If you are wearing a set of lenses, use light, soothing colors because, too flashy and dark picture won’t appear good.

3. Don’t use your phone camera, webcam! The obvious mistakes people make is using the phone camera. Like, many of us say, Oh Now I’m looking fab, let’s have a photo! You might look fab that moment, but trust me that picture is not suitable for a facebook profile picture.

4. Don’t post your pictures with alcohol, cigarettes or anything that is questionable- If your profile pictures are not set to private, you never know who sees your profile. You might wonder that you look cooler with cigarettes or with that tiny glass of vodka/tequila.

5. Give a great pose- it is important for you to look fantastic, so you must always give a great pose to the photographer. Look into the lens confidently. A great pose teamed up with great set of clothes and make-up makes it just PERFECT!

6. Smile! You shall get all the glitters and charm with your smile. The best pictures are the ones with a genuine and a happy smile. It should appear as if you’ve a new job or for some reason you’re genuinely happy!

So, these are some pointers you can keep in mind when you click your new facebook profile picture!

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Tips on how to deal with Criticism

“Criticism, like rain, should be gentle enough to nourish a man’s growth without destroying his roots.”
–    Frank A. Clark

First thing you need to know about criticism is that “Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain and most fools do.” – Benjamin Franklin. So do not take it personally as criticism is a part of our life and we must accept them, even though they sometimes can upset us or make us feel hurt. You should keep in mind that if you are doing something creative, you are naturally an open target for criticism and rejection. If you are working for a different person such as a client you might work hard and do the best you can but at the end your creation will be rejected or highly criticized. But you should also know that if someone does not like your work and criticizes it, this would not mean that he does not like you.  Here are some tips on how to deal with criticism and rejection.

• Do not be defensive – You should not react immediately to it defensively and take it personally as you will miss the point. Be self aware and not aggressive trying to immediately prove your critic wrong.
• Anger – If you are emotional while taking criticism, your reactions will be less controlled. You should control your emotions and not be angry. Keep in mind that your work being criticized does not have anything to do with you personally. While you are angry you might say things that you will regret in the future and you will not learn anything about your work in a different person’s perspective. If you want to make it big, you will have to be able to take criticism, listen to it and apply it in your work if reasonable.
• Asking for feedback – Ask people for feedback about your work and be prepared to deal with criticism. After hearing the criticism see if the critic has all the information and it is accurate and unbiased. Ask the critic to explain further and how he/she gathered the information. Consider the possibilities of misunderstandings. Take some time to think and make sure to be calm. It won’t hurt as much if you as for the feedback yourself.
• Once your discussion is over think over about what was said during the conversation and try to see if it can actually help your growth.

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Abuse: How to deal with it

It has been very nicely put by some genius, “Abuse is a poisonous cocktail of control-freakery, conforming to social and cultural norms, and latent sadism.” Abuse, as an agenda is too broad so to dip in this cocktail further, let’s see a major classification. There are variant abuses with different causes, symptoms and preventions attached to it.

Starting off with one of the 108 types of abuses, we take up ‘Emotional abuse’ first. This majorly is witnessed among the couples. For such an abuse, it is important to realise that switching to a new partner can be avoided by changing your reactions; who knows how the new partner would be and it’s difficult to stay as a divorcee of course. Things can very well work out if you try and set new reasonable terms to subsequently pursue a better relation. But remember, you must be able to judge when to bid adieu.

Next, let’s pick up ‘Physical abuse’. Also sometimes termed as ‘Bullying’ at primary levels, physical abuse goes a long way in context of consequences. One may even go into depression and spend the entire life ahead in isolation. To deal with the same, first and foremost, freeze in your mind that you aren’t the only one to be suffering from this. In case of bullies or abusers, follow the 4-R therapy: Recognize, Relate, Report and Record.

Further, we have ‘Domestic abuse’ which consists of any kind of physical or sexual misbehavior either at home or workplace. Majorly exhibited at workplaces with a lot of women around and the successive increment in vulnerability, some of the explored solutions are firstly keeping calm and subsequently following your instincts. Don’t fear losing your job but know for a fact that your dignity must mean the most to you. Check for a corresponding rule in the office protocol and take appropriate actions instead of being impulsive. Whip out a diary that will help you document your feelings, not to suppress them but vent them in a right way.

In addition to this, we will learn of ‘Homophobic Abuse’. It’s pretty understandable as to how difficult it is when you’re being abused for being a gay or a lesbian. Realise in the first place that you have the right to your life and it’s not your fault. Learn to confront the abuser in the right way at the right time and right on his/her face. And, the best of all is that most of the globe’s legislation talks about the LGBT law. So, nobody can further offend you because you chose your way to life and you should be proud of taking a stand.

Last, but not the least, we’ll turn our eyes to ‘Drug abuse’. The initiation step to deal with drug addiction is to ‘decide’. Have the will power to refrain yourself from its very sight. Next, be patient. It will take time but not forever. Stock up on nutritious and a healthy balanced diet. This is merely to keep up your strength to deal with the withdrawal symptoms. Identify your triggers and consciously avoid them. Acknowledge yourself with the long term dangers and train your mind and soul accordingly.

Conclusively, never fear visiting a therapist. It will just help you live happily for years to come! Keep smiling and stay blessed!

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How to deal with an annoying colleague

It is very easy to deal with a hard work load, a hectic day or for that matter, even a boring one per se! However, it is very difficult to deal with someone who you don’t have control over unlike your work load! An annoying colleague can be really difficult to handle unless you really know how to. In this case, it is necessary to control oneself more than the other person since you practically can’t close the other person into a file like you would do to other papers! Here are some ways that you can try.

1. Avoid

Stay clear of your annoying co-worker. This is the first step of dealing with anything. If it is not necessary to interact on a professional basis with this person, then don’t interact with him! Do not bother asking about personal matters or exchanging meaningless pleasantries. Be polite whenever you do speak to him but do not make yourself obliged to talk to him by the water cooler, washroom or any such other location.

2. Voice concerns politely

If the annoying colleague happens to be talking on the phone loudly; in a way that disturbs you, tell him or her politely. Blame yourself in a funny manner too saying that since you have a less concentration span, you aren’t able to concentrate on your work. If he keeps using the office internet for personal means while you need to work, politely say that it is slowing down the connection as a whole.

3. Ask yourself first

Ask yourself if you have unrealistic expectations from your co-worker. An ideal office environment is a utopian situation and does not exist. Ask yourself if you are right in judging him or her to the extent you are. Some employees can be truly disrupting and some are just the ones that you need to increase your acceptance level towards. If the co-worker falls in the second category, you know what you have to do.

4. Ignore

This isn’t the best solution but when work really is your priority, you cannot do anything else. Turn all his unnecessary requests down like joining him for lunch, going for dinner etc. Just focus on your work and put all the blame on how busy you are. The colleague will soon understand that you have zero interest in anything that he or she is doing or saying.

5. Talk to someone else

Ask your family or friends if they are dealing with similar situations. If yes, ask them how they deal with it. Everyone has their share of annoying colleagues. You might just find a lot of solutions that you might be seeking for.

While dealing with an annoying colleague, one must understand that this will not be the end of all problems. Therefore, while dealing with another person, one must also work towards increasing one’s own tolerance levels. Every working place is going to have its fair share of problems. After all, it all boils down to how we choose to deal with whatever is placed in front of us. The sooner we learn, the quicker it is going to help us achieve our own professional goals.

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How to improve your spoken English???

More than a million people on this earth wish to be eloquent in English. So, first of all, relax yourselves and be proudly convinced that you’re NOT the only one. English speaking indeed is an important “skill” that you must possess to easily get through variant job profiles and affairs alike, keeping in mind the scenario of today’s competitive age. And of course, employment is not the only positive point that comes effectively with better command at spoken English; it’s just an instance to quote.

A lot of people are left wondering in search of English speaking courses with an obvious question frozen in their minds, i.e. how to improve at English speaking. Essentially, it is very important to know that spending a multiple thousands at these spoken English courses is going to help only if they practice. Taking into consideration the same, there are some simple “home remedies” to improvise on spoken English.

The term “home remedies” may sound funny, but in literal sense, it’s highly effective because the underlying magic of “practice” stays the same. So, why spend on these courses???

Now imbibe in these simple practices in your daily routine and become virtually “perfect” at spoken English. Let the enchanting fluency of words flow. ~Abra ka Dabra~

1. Don’t try and be a Mozart in the very beginning. Speak like you do, but make sure you don’t commit mistakes. Now obviously, mistakes WILL happen! THE MATTER OF FACT IS, DON’T LET THEM REPEAT.

2. You ought to be patient during the entire journey of your ‘crooked’ to ‘fluent’ spoken English. Yes, the learning process may get tedious and boring, even frustrating at times, but you’re to make sure that you know how to tackle it well. Keep your aim frozen in your puppy eyes all the time.

3. Don’t be hesitant in initiating a conversation with somebody in English. Remember, nobody’s perfect? While at the same time, don’t take offence if somebody tries to correct you; it’s your benefit after all. Isn’t it?  Furthermore, you can try joining several forums and chat sessions where people are conversing in English and have the same interests.

4. Try and read as many English books as possible. Preferably, pick up a book of your interest, and don’t just read through, try to grasp as many new words as possible. Also, it is a good idea to record your voice and play to check where you made mistakes in terms of pronunciation and accent.

5. Listen to loads of slow English music clips, try writing the lyrics on your own based on your comprehension first followed by verifying from net. This subtle way of learning is indeed fun and entertaining.

6. It will be great if you get a hang of the phonetics and then look up the dictionary periodically to improve on one the major aspects of efficient spoken English, vocabulary. Phonetics will help you with the correct pronunciation and dictionary would imprint the meanings on your brain.

7. Most importantly, read books on grammar and solve various practice exercises. GRAMMAR is one of the major ingredients of spoken English recipe. Remember, it’s perfectly okay even if you start from an elementary level book. Nobody was born intelligent, right?

Let the beautiful wings of “spoken English” grow under the wings of your charismatic personality!!!

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How to make a great first impression

First impressions can be quite important.Everyone stereotypes everyone on first impression, even if we are reluctant to do it. We all get a first impression of a new person that creates a mental image of his or her personality in our minds.

That image of you often lasts and can affect the relationship that follows.Another thing is that we often play different roles in relationships. With our parents we play one role, with friends another, with someone we are interested in/in love with a third, when shopping for clothes in a store a fourth. And so on.A good or great first impression can create a positive role in the minds of the new people we meet. When we meet them again, we are often drawn back into this role. Sometimes it happens almost unconsciously until you after a few minutes notice that you have fallen into your old role – like when you meet friends you haven’t seen in years – in that dynamic once again.

Use the name of a new acquaintance frequently. “Judy, I like that suggestion.” “Your vacation must have been exciting, Fred.” You show that you have paid attention from the start, catching the name during the introduction. Equally as important, you’ll make conversations more personal by including the listener’s name several times.

Be careful with humor. Although a quip or two might serve as an icebreaker, stay away from sarcastic remarks that could backfire. Because you don’t know a stranger’s sensitivities, prolonged joking might establish barriers you can’t overcome, either now or later.

Be approachable. Smile and make contact. People will approach and interact with those who are approachable and friendly. It is a face that people do business with those they like, respect and trust.

Commit to becoming a master at listening. Only when you listen to people, do you find out what their needs are, goals, etc. and then you can figure out if you have a solution for them or if they can refer you to someone who fits your ideal client

Be a resource. Listen to their problems and what causes them stress. Then you can be the one to offer a solution, fill their need. They will be forever grateful and know they will remember you as a knowledgeable, positive resource

Look people in the eyes; give them your full attention as if they are the most interesting people in the world – if your eyes are darting about, looking for the next prospect, you’ll lose them; if you’re texting, checking your email, or responding to a call in the middle of the conversation, you’ll lose them.

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Liar Liar!

“How dare you lie to me!” If you have been hearing this for quite some time then it’s high time to see a psychiatrist. “PSEUDOLOGIA FANTASTICA“(Latin phrase meaning uncontrollable lying) is a behavior whereby a person resorts to lies very often. Also termed as “Pathological lying” or “Mythomania”, a person tends to lie on regular basis without realizing the negative consequences. Pathological lying is compulsive in nature that takes over rational thinking and is a symptom of mental illness.

A controlled lie which is said after a certain level of thoughtfulness will have some beneficial impacts unlike pathological lying characterized by uncontrolled concealing of truth. Borderline personality disorder and false memory syndrome are associated with pseudologia fantastica. At times people lie since they benefit from it or simply to gain attention. Pathological lying is an addiction whereby a person has no personal gain but still cannot refrain from doing so.

Pathological lying may occur due to reasons like genetic components, dysfunctional or insecure childhood, dyslexia, mental retardation, over parental protection, impulse control dysfunction or other type of cerebral dysfunction. Lying is also a sign of low self esteem which makes an individual knit a web of lies around himself that gives a boost to his self esteem. To make up for lack of knowledge, cover up embarrassment, avoid confrontations are other reasons often seen in pathological lying which are by and far linked emotionally.

Body language of person acts as a Lie-O-Meter. A slight change in the body language is enough to get you caught in the act. Avoiding eye contact, reduced speech rate, sheepish smile, taking frequent pauses and lack of head movement are some signs of lying! Medication and psychotherapy are the most common treatments for this mental disorder.

When this power of truth is established with you, then even in dream you will never tell an untruth. You will be true in thought, word and deed. Whatever you say will be truth. You may say to man, “Be blessed”, and that man will be blessed. If a man is diseased and you say to him, “Be thou cure”, he will be cured immediately.
                                                                                                                                                                    SWAMI VIVEKANANDA

Try to realize the immense power of truth with these words of wisdom. At the end a good state of mind that is devoid of any ill thinking will make a person resort to truth always. Dumping fear and unwanted thinking is the best solution. Though speaking the truth will put you through ups and downs, it will help you develop a strong state of mind. Speak the truth-atleast you don’t have to strain your brain to recall the lie you said!

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Friends Checklist

A list of the ‘types’ of friends you should definitely invest in.
Read on to see which ones you already have.

1. The Secret Keeper:
You ‘ve got family issues, personal problems, that weird rash you can’t tell anybody about?? This is the first person you call in any of these situations. This friend is not gender specific and really, no rules of length of friendship or physical proximity apply.This friend could even be a pen pal for that matter!

2. The Competition:
This buddy will keep you on your toes. Be it professional excellence or the perfect 10 bod..he/she will make sure you re on you’re A game all the time. But at the end of the day, whoever wins, you always celebrate together!

3. The Family Friend:
You meet this one through family. Maybe your parents hung out in college or your families met on vacation. They make all your family dos fun and sufferable.The best thing is, if you ever want permission to go out, use THIS NAME. If its ok with THEIR parents, yours wouldn’t object.

4. The Fashionista:
Got an important date or a job interview? This is the friend who will tell you to your face if you look like a goof. The friend need not be a gay designer type or a la-di-dah socialite. As long as they let you know those pants don’t fit right.

5. The Emergency Date:
You ‘re single but you need a partner for those salsa lessons. Or you need help picking out a gift for your significant other. Enter the platonic friend of the opp. gender! This gal-pal or guy-bud will offer views from the other planet. But otherwise, this friend is the usual back-slapping friend who doesn’t care two hoots about what people think when you hang out together. You shouldn’t too.

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